AN OPEN LETTER TO AL QAEDA , SUNNI INSURGENTS, AND SHIA EXTREMISTS IN IRAQ

Dear Enemy,

Our leadership in Congress has decided to set a timetable for withdrawal. Please take note that the Fall of 2008 is when you most likely be able to conduct your operations without impediment from our forces in the region. We'd like to remind you that until the Fall of 2008 we will still be able to conduct operations as normal, therefore it would be in your best interest to place a hold on your suicide bombings, IEDs, and the like until said date. This would allow you ample time to build up your infrastructure and logistics to a reasonable level in order to complete your goal of establishing a corridor of operations for terrorists, extremists, and the like, in the Middle East. We wish you the best of luck in your endeavours. Sorry we couldn't stay longer. You know, Democrats and stuff.

Sincerely,

The United States